Some random Robservations.
– You take your daughter to a new church for Vacation Bible School and hang out in case she gets fussy. Looking around, you notice that of all the other parents there not volunteering, you’re the only dad.
– You are capable of having deep intensive discussions on the local thrift store scene.
– More than once you’ve chastised your wife for not knowing how to properly load the dishwasher. Plus, you’re a bit irked when she touched it cause the kitchen is your job anyway.
– You watch P.S. I Love You with your wife and tell her it was a great movie. And you mean it.
– When at Ingle’s you use the racecar shopping cart so your daughter can “drive” around the store, and you run near full speed down at least two different aisles and the back meat aisle so she can “go fast.”
– You can sing and/or whistle at least five Disney Channel show theme songs (Handy Manny …. Handy Manny).
– You buy your little girl football jerseys.
– Whenever your children begin to do something dangerous (climb the couch, get on the kitchen counter, perch on top of the racecar shopping cart), you say the same thing, “You’re gonna fall and hurt yourself and what am I gonna do? I’m gonna laugh.” And you mean it.
– You constantly remind your wife to take her time when she goes shopping every weekend leaving you home with the kids. And you mean it.
– You’ve had three toddlers repeatedly scream in your face, “You’re a silly goose!” and you yell back, “Noooo! YOU’RE a silly goose!”
– You’re faster with the laundry than your wife.
– You’ve read The Red Tent, and enjoyed it.
– You go to a local bar to watch the ASU-Furman game and have a few beverages with two college-aged guys, yet you’re the one who leaves with the waitress’s phone number. Cause she’s a cheerleader and, you know, your little girl likes to cheer and wants to meet Yosef.
– Whenever your infant son wants to play in the dishwasher, you say “no-no” and remind him that even though dad does it, this is actually women’s work.
– You’ve threatened to throw your child away. And you mean it. (Not really)